hard times

sometimes i just wish i was back in disneyworld...

february seems to be a hard month for everyone. there's no holidays to be excited for, everything just seems so cold and depressing.
i don't understand why bad things seem to come in waves. ever since we came back from disney, it's just been one after another.

i recently found out that my grandpa harsh has entered the final stages of alzheimers. he can not longer lift his head or feed himself. i've never been to close to my grandma and grandpa harsh, and now i can only think of what i've missed out on. it kills me to think of them in that nursing home... i'm trying not to think about it anymore.
i wish i could actually talk about it. i know that when i say it out loud i'll start crying and not be able to stop.

i wish i could write more, but i feel the tears coming. i think i'm just better off going to sleep...

16 days

16 more days until we leave for disney world! it's starting to feel surreal.. i've only been there twice in the past four years. i went when i was 15 or 16, but decided not to go again because my parents hated chris timko. then i went when i was 18, and i spent most of the time trying to get a hold of god-for-nothing dan.

i'm still finding it hard to believe that i'm actually going with the love of my life. i mean, i listen to the music and it almost brings a tear to my eye thinking about being there with my future husband. it's a dream come true.

my first entry

random facts

• i've been to disney world about 2 dozen times
• i love chilli's skillet queso
• i don't know how to ride a bike
• i have 15 pairs of converse
• i love wearing skirts
• i don't know how to ride a bike
• i love boys with curly hair
• i have scoliosis
  
• i hate nothing more than doing dishes
• reality tv is my guilty pleasure
• i bite my nails
• my favorite movie is titanic
• i play guitar, trumpet, and french horn
• i love doing laundry
• i'm terrified of ET
  
• i am obsessed with zelda
• i can play most of the songs from ocarina of time on my guitar
• i hated my boyfriend the first time i met him
• i love carbs
• i wanted to be a model when i was little, and was devastated when i realized that i was too short
• i'm known to hold grudges
• i love ameristop ice cream
• i hate arm pits
• my boyfriend and i waited 10 hours outside of walmart for a wii the day it released... and we weren't even planning on it
• sometimes i pretend i'm a lion
• i'm almost always barefoot